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Welcome To My Secret Garden
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Its was a happy day!! Other than all the mugging and Sian-ness of mugging, it was still a happy day!! Mugging did not manage to dampen my spirits for once.. Wahaha!!
For once, I feel more than happy that my period finally came. Wait! Before you even think about it... It has nothing to do with pregnancy or whatsoever! Haha! I just can't wait to take my hormone pills for my acne (in case you might not know, you have till the period comes before taking the pills) Isn't the thought that I am just one step closer to better skin delighting? I am delighted!
The fact that I have gained hope that my face will be better soon made my day! (Last few days was hell! My face was so bad, I didn't feel like going out, I had bad mood and I could not even concentrate on anyone and anything)
I realised something, when girls get together, they always tend to always talk about marriage, relationships etc. As we all know, females are emotional creatures. Yep!
SH asked, "Will you be worried if you are 24 and still single?"
Hmmmmm.... Maybe a year ago, I would say I will be very worried, but as for now, I don't think I'll be worried. Only people with low self-confidence will be worried. Somehow, I have gained a little confidence recently... And being single definitely has no cause for worry for me as of now.
I changed my mind regarding early marriage and early child-birth. I realised that I used to live in planet Euthopia after sorting out some thoughts. I think I am not ready for marriage at all. I have a sudden spur to experience a life of a workaholic. Sounds insane but I really wanna do something great before I get buried in the constraints tagged to marriage.
Do I wanna be a homemaker??? No, but maybe yes 10 years later.
Been having loads of conversations with the girls and I find my life is so screwed. I have no goal, no directions. I don't even know what and what I wanna work as after I graduate. I don't even know what I really want in life.
I find that I am too caught up with problems of my everyday life that I don't even realised that I have yet to think about such important issues.
Isn't life complicated? Why can't life be smooth-sailing? Why do feelings change? Why can't Romeo and Juliet live happily ever after? Why do people keep secrets? So many questions, hardly I can think of any logical answers. There is no such thing as a simple life, the more simple you want it to be, the more complicated it gets.
I am disappointed with myself.
What is disappointment? It is a feeling dejection that arises when anticipation is not realised. One should not feel disappointed if when expectation is not met. Neither should one lose faith and give up. Continue! Be persistent! Hold on to your hopes, dreams and desires. There will definitely be a lucky day.... someday....
I hope tomorrow will be a lucky day, and I will meet lucky people and get myself immersed in a lucky atmosphere!
With Love, Jas 2:10 AM
Jasmin Kee
CHIJ-OLGC, Cedar Girls' Sec Sch, CJC, SIM
jas2104@hotmail.com
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